Things I’ve Learned in College (Alternate Title: I’m a Fucking Idiot)
This semester I’ve learned that casual relationships and causal relationships are not the same thing. Typos are my bitch. I’ve also learned that under stress numbers sorta look the same.
For example, over the weekend I decided to run my DARS report to make sure I was on target to graduate in December. In the report I read that I still needed 16 credits. Do you see that anywhere in this report?
Yeah, I didn’t think so. Congratulate yourself on being smarter than I am.
In a panic I sent numerous emails and left voice mails for my adviser. I went on and on about how my sanity and bank account couldn’t handle another semester. I begged her to help me find a solution. I may or may not have been crying in two of the voice mails. Sure it’s only one class and not the end of the world, but I’m just ready to be done.
She emailed me back today to let me know what you guys already know: I’m bad with details. I have everything I need to graduate in December, EXCEPT my application for graduation that was due in June.
Thank God for late fees people. Seriously.
I had to read the first sentence backwards to finally see the error. You aren’t the only one!
Late fees are included in my montly budget. I forget things.
The end.
If it makes you feel better, my blurry eyes read “Earned 26.00 Hours Needs 16 Hours” as 16, and because you were talking about credits, I thought I spotted it. Just for a moment…
You never claimed to be good at math!
Hello, that reminds me when I was in college, working part time in a hospital. They asked me “when are you graduating?” I said “I don’t know…” Went to the offices, applied for graduation, and it turns out I had gone an entire extra semester, and didn’t even know it. Just having a good time I guess. Or it was the other job at the WINE STORE…