Honesty is Never the Best Policy, Except for Sometimes
Teaching five-year-olds the art of ‘your mom’ jokes is not an easy undertaking. I wouldn’t suggest doing it sober. After I explained to my nephew, Carter, how to properly make one, we had a practice session. IT DID NOT GO WELL!
Carter: “You’re silly.”
Me: “Your mom is silly.”
Carter: “She is really, really silly. I love her.”
Me: “Buddy that’s now how it works. Let’s try it again.”
Carter: “You smell like diapers.”
Me: “Your mom smells like diapers.
Carter: “NO SHE DOESN’T! She smells pretty. You smell pretty too Aunt Sarah. Like cookies.”
I gave up and told him we’d try again when he was older, and maybe then he would understand. His twin sister Hannah got upset and said, “Aunt Sarah I get it, but I’m older by three whole minutes so I’m smarter.” To which I replied, “No Hannah you’re smarter because you’re a girl.”
I feel like honestly is always the best policy, especially with young and impressionable children.
The title of this blog post contradicts itself. To avoid that kind of contradictions, you should never use the word never.
My seven year old doesn’t get mom jokes either, but it’s fun to make em anyway.
How cute that he thinks you smell like cookies!! I love that kids relate smells to treats.
You smell like cookies!!! That is like the best compliment ever!!! Especially if it is sugar cookies with frosting and sprinkles. (I picture you as a sprinkle kind of girl.)
I think you deserve the “Worlds Greatest Babysitter” award for all your hard efforts!
Do you wear cookie perfume?
The first sentence of this post? Awesome.
Its amazing how impressionable kids are. I made the mistake of telling my 6 year old nephew that I thought he looked silly when his dad had him shave his head. Now, two years later, he has hair past his shoulders and refuses to let anyone cut it.
I see you’ve started numbering your comments so you don’t have to count them manually during giveaways. That’s something your mom would do.
Right, right?
No?
Back to your mom jokes school for me.
You’re cute with kids! You should collect some.
as long as they are good cookies!
Unfortunately, these jokes are lost on me. They’re always totally true, in my case.
Awww….you should be a teacher. I hate when kids tv only focuses on passe education, like shapes and numbers and words. Laaammmeeee. That shit won’t get you felt up on the playground, people.