Poof I’m a Lesbian

Blogged under friends on Tuesday 23 December 2008 at 8:30 am

Sunday my friend Aimee and I had SarAimee adventures.

In the old days, before she let a boy move into her house, our adventures included lots and lots of girly stuff.  This adventure, however, included a trip into two snowboarding stores.

It was here I discovered that I’m going to be a lesbian.

Aimee was talking to the clerk about the difference in snowboarding socks when I heard something that changed my life: antibacterial socks.

After questioning the clerk on why anyone would need antibacterial in socks, I found out that people don’t wash their snowboarding gear.  And by people I mean boys.  The flashback images of all the dirty-footed snowboarding guys I’ve made out with in my life caused immediate hives.  I swore off boys right then and there.

On our way home we needed a major infusion of estrogen so we stopped by a coffee shop named Diva.  It helped, but I’m probably going to have to stick to my original plan and make 2009 the year of the lesbian.

Every time you share me I won't punch a kitten!
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18 Comments »

  1. Comment 1by kel — December 23, 2008 @ 8:51 am

    But if it was your boyfriend, you could spend all your time washing his clothes. Isn’t that what a good girlfriend would do???

  2. Comment 2by JM Bell — December 23, 2008 @ 9:03 am

    This was not the post I was looking for …

  3. Comment 3by Tracie — December 23, 2008 @ 9:27 am

    That’s going to make RLO very, very sad….

  4. Comment 4by Lizzy — December 23, 2008 @ 9:33 am

    I’ve also toyed with the idea to make 2009 the year of the lesbian… ;) So, you’re not alone!!

  5. Comment 5by Kate — December 23, 2008 @ 9:47 am

    Do lesbians snowboard?

    ha ha ha ha ha!

  6. Comment 6by Cat — December 23, 2008 @ 10:38 am

    It’s official – you’ve made all my hopes and dreams come true. Call me!

  7. Comment 7by Scott the Stray — December 23, 2008 @ 11:13 am

    Isn’t every year the year of the lesbian?

  8. Comment 8by Blake — December 23, 2008 @ 11:45 am

    sweet! I hope you find a tasty redhead!

  9. Comment 9by Windy City — December 23, 2008 @ 11:53 am

    Does this mean you’re trading in the scooter for a pink Harley?

  10. Comment 10by Sra — December 23, 2008 @ 12:10 pm

    How did you get this far along in life without learning that boys are dirty? :)

    Your options are to (1) accept, (2) join, or (3) rebel (in the form of lesbianism, of course)

  11. Comment 11by sovknight — December 23, 2008 @ 1:01 pm

    There had better be pictures.

  12. Comment 12by Lozza — December 23, 2008 @ 4:00 pm

    hahahaha classic.. well whatever makes u happy =o)

  13. Comment 13by hippo brigade — December 23, 2008 @ 6:20 pm

    I WANT antibacterial socks. I’m adding them to my Christmas list right now.

  14. Comment 14by Andi — December 23, 2008 @ 6:25 pm

    Wow, you got lots of undesired traffic with that title ;-)

  15. Comment 15by Michelle — December 23, 2008 @ 7:42 pm

    I suppose it could work if you really enjoy the taste of tuna.

  16. Comment 16by mikey — December 23, 2008 @ 7:57 pm

    Hello Kitty!

  17. Comment 17by JaneyRuth — December 24, 2008 @ 3:07 pm

    You wanna be a lesbian? Here’s the song…

    I wish I was a lesbian and not a hetero
    I wouldn’t have to mess with men and all their come-and-go
    And all that awful facial hair and yucky “ma-chis-mo”
    Ooooooo, I wish I was a lesbian and not a hetero

    I wish I was a lesbian and that I wasn’t straight
    I would sleep with women only; man, that would be great
    I could throw away my diaphragm; I wouldn’t wanna mate
    Ooooooo, I wish I was a lesbian and that I wasn’t straight

    I wish I was a lesbian; I’d like to be a dyke
    I would hang with k.d. lang; Mel Gibson, take a hike
    I think it would be nice to love someone who was alike
    Ooooooo, I wish I was a lesbian; I’d like to be a dyke

    I wish I was a lesbian; that’s why this song is sung
    It shouldn’t have to matter how someone is hung
    Other things are more important…LIKE HOW TO USE YOR TOUNGE.
    I wish I was a lesbian; that’s why this song is sung

    http://tinyurl.com/gf-s-first-day

  18. Comment 18by rockandcookies — December 25, 2008 @ 5:45 pm

    I wanted to let you know that there was a pair of brand new Burton non-stinky socks waiting under the tree for my favorite dirty snowboard boy. The rest of the gear… still dirty. Good thing we have “The Boy Room”.

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