Dry Humping for the Holidays
RLO is ruining my life and apparently I only have myself to blame.
I recently set him up with one of my co-workers. I know, I know… in my attempt to see RLO happy I completely forgot how this would affect me–which, is pretty surprising given how selfish I am.
Thus far I’ve been pretty patient with the whole thing. I mean yeah, I’m annoyed that he’s sooooo busy dry-humping that he’s not available to go out to dinner with me. But, being the good friend that I am, I’ve dealt with it and probably saved a lot of money as a result. However, with the holiday season fast approaching I’ve got quite the dilemma: RLO has always been my pseudo date for events and parties.
Enter office party.
Enter a dateless Sarah.
Enter the end of my life.
Now that I’ve set them up, I’ve got to break them up before the office Christmas party. I’ve got a few ideas, but since most of them illegal I’m relying on RLO to screw this one up on his own. I know he’ll do the right thing. The right thing for me, not him.
Dateless Sarah? pshaw, It can’t be hard for you to find a date!
(finding one that’s cool enough for you or doesn’t drive you nutso however, may be a different story)
There’s always that Dingleberry Trollstein guy to fall back on.
I always bring a friend as a date, but most of my friends are women. So sometimes it goes over well, other times not so much. Basically it just makes everyone think I am a lesbian.
Hey, what happened to the other Brokke? I thought he was a psuedo date for you, too???? Oh, nevermind, now I remember what happened to him. It’s called a vagina.
Um It can’t be Psuedo if your obsessed………
didn’t the contract say rlo is yours for the office party? i’d double check…
If RLO does screw it all up, imagine how awkward the party is going to be then. However it might prove to be perversely amusing too.
That explains why you have been so obsessed with the RLO posts lately. He is dating someone and you feel insecure because the two of you are really hot for each other. If he didn’t love Jesus, and you didn’t love sex, you would be together in a heartbeat. You guys just need to give it up and hook up already. God, you guys are like Derek and Meredith on Grey’s Anatomy…who am I kidding though…I keep reading your posts day after day, waiting for the one golden post that announces, RLO AND I HAD SEX, AND JESUS SAW IT AND SAID IT WAS GOOD!
The embarrassment of going to a party solo is always forgotten by the 4th glass of wine. So my solution is to start drinking BEFORE the party (think cab, not scooter), and then you won’t give a shit that you’re arriving alone!!!
Give it up, propose!
Huh..Lots of RLO posts lately. Now I know why.
Tell her that RLO has a very contagious rash that keeps popping up in the strangest places. That oughta scare her off.
If only more girls were this honest with themselves.