RLO Has Reached Stardom
Although I’ve forbidden it, RLO does have other friends. Most of which are female. And if I hadn’t recently promised to stop making him sound so gay on this website I’d point out that the boy has more fag hags than Hollywood. That doesn’t make him sound gay, right? That’s what I thought.
Anyway, one of these friends, Sugar, recently took a trip to Chicago for business and met up with an old friend who lives there. The friend was playing with Sugar’s phone and noticed some pictures that RLO had taken. When Sugar mentioned his name the friend asked if she was talking about Sarah Nielson’s RLO.
Which leave me wondering why strangers on the Internet realizes I own RLO, but he doesn’t. Clearly I have my work cut out for me.
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Don’t let it get to RLO’s head! Before you know it, he’ll be leaving you to hang out with Brangelina and Oprah, and you’ll be stuck at home, trying to convince people that YES! You are the one that brought RLO to stardom! YES, THEEEE RLO!
RLO may win every best supporting actor award out there, but you’ll still be the lead actress.
It’s nothing a good branding won’t fix, my dearest. When the slaves of the Jangle family began to wonder if we truly owned them (some foolish notion of a Thirteenth Ammendment — silly fools, there are but 10 Commandments in this household), we simply tattood our family crest on their foreheads.
Unfortunately, the Supreme Court has since ruled that we did not, in fact, own Jose and Mariela (our gardener and maid). It turns out they had been living in their own homes the whole time; they awoke so early every morning, naught a Jangle had ever seen them arrive, and thus simply assumed they belonged to us! Hence the crests were removed, and a hearty settlement was duly reached. Now I am down to but one bondservant, who is virtually immobile with laziness. May you have better luck with RLO.
I was riding TRAX yesterday and the girl across the aisle from me obviously saw someone who looked like RLO because she squealed to her friend “OMG, I just saw RLO!” and her friend squealed “No WAY!” So I said “WAY!” because I am that hip, and I also eavesdrop.
It was like an Elvis sighting.
Which is weird, because I totally thought I saw him on a grainy TMZ video the other day…
Does that man realize how easily he could get laid via this internet stardom? But Jesus won’t let him. Bad Jesus.
Would RLO be grossed out or intrigued if random girls started throwing their undies at him? Because I’m sure it’s just right around the corner and about to happen any moment. Maybe he should take celebrity training classes so he doesn’t let it go to his head.
That’s the beauty of RLO. He’s clueless. ha ha ha!
I thought RLO was gay….no?
RLO knows he’s yours, he just playing along…..
RLO should be indebted to you for life for taking him with you on your rise to stardom. That’s what I think anyway.