who needs craig’s list, after all….
it’s time to revamp my male friends. the current ones are so last season. i need someone new and exciting. my new friend(s) will need to have the following:
-hbo
-patience, lots and lots of it
-dog friendly
-excellent chauffeuring skills
-willing to sit through independent film, but also willing to be the blockbuster scapegoat (sometimes a girl needs a popular movie without taking the indie-shame)
-needs to have oodles of books laying around for me to “borrow”
-has the attention span to sit with me for hours at sbux
-can magically fix my laundry situation
-excellent wine selection
**apply within, only serious need apply.
Is someone passing the sign up sheet around? Do we need to take shifts? How’s this thing gonna work?
So does that mean that all of us expired, last season, passe male friends are allowed to keep certain iToys as consolation?
not a chance, tim.
however, it is possible for those expired friends to be re-tested for a longer date of use. the testing is extensive and would take a fair amount of time. which means you would have to be willing to put in a fair amount of time. sensing a pattern here?
***Warning***
Friend status may be shorter than it apears.
anonymous,
LAME!
heart,
sarah
So my question is was that only funny to people who know Sarah, or everyone? Hilarious.
If I didn’t live in Ohio I would apply but the commute would be a bitch. (And I don’t have any wine)
If that is your list for a friend, I can’t imagine what the boyfriend list must look like. As Harry told Sally, you’re the worst kind of high maintanence, you think you’re low maintanence.
Best of luck to all applicants.
scott,
that is an entirely separate list, one that deserves it’s own post, a long post. somehow i think we would be the only two entertained by it…..
s
Your not worthy.
lips to ass,
if i’m not worthy, why are you wasting time reading my blog?
-s
Because you could be.
i already am.
prove it
rather hard to prove through blog comments, even for a superhero like myself.
Words are not proof, just merely suggestions of your worth.
Real proof comes through eye contact. Will she weakly look away, does she see reality, or does she burn holes holes into my soul?
These are questions that should be explored.
hmmm
Your ‘re seeing it now, aren’t you Bubba.
knock it off spongebob….
thats spongejohn. You have broken both my spell and my manhood.
I’m not worthy.
(weakly turns and runs to his death)
obviously, i need to re-watch when harry met sally, as i only recall the diner orgasm scene.
Fake it till you make it.
let’s move on, shall we?
You brought that stupid movie up.