Sarah Bellum's Tales of Wit and Charm

i am a sell out.

tonight, i sold out to american idol. having never seen a single episode i finally tuned in to see what all the fuss was about. my self diagnosed attention deficit disorder only allowed twenty minutes. i refuse to admit i enjoyed the show. however, i absolutely (pun intended) admit i’m madly in lust with the dreamy ace “i want to hump you” young. luckily, i was able to stop drooling long enough to notice that ace reminded me of someone….

so, shag-worthy twins separated at birth?!

i double-triple latte love jason lewis–otherwise known as smith jared, samantha’s super sexy boyfriend on sex in the city.

i tell you this lest i end up chopped into pieces and placed into someone’s deep freezer, only to be discovered by my trusty lassy dog daisy, and only because she was hungry and there wasn’t anyone to fill her bowl (someone has to keep her in fatness, and that someone is me) –this will serve as my written record of such events that led up to my untimely death.

i am contemplating signing up for match.com (gasp). if i don’t end up dead, think of the possibilities. no, not the possible dating matches, the possible entertainment factor. i blame jacquie brown. if you weren’t getting married and i wasn’t faced with finding a date i wouldn’t have realized just how long it has been since i was asked out on a proper date. so jac this one is on you–miss me when i am gone!

this post is my preventative maintenance, as i have yet to join. please feel free to attempt talking me out of it.

a cautionary tale when eating at la frontera…..

alex calls this my “is there really a guy wearing a hat that says cocks behind me look”.

enough said.

i saw this today while at the store!
when the normal person sees a giant beware of dog sign they, well beware! not me. i made the mistake of getting closer. remember barkley from sesame street? well, a ferocious larger version of that dog lunged at me through the half open window. i screamed and ran. sadly, there was no pmk to hide behind this time.

as soon as it warms up enough to take daisy in the car again, i am soooo getting one. how funny would it be to see that sign on a car with a pug? i can’t wait!